Weekly Wildflowers #17
The House is Quiet Again, 3 Quick Takes, Deep Abiding Acceptance
The house is quiet again. The kids are back at their hybrid school after a week of Spring break, and no one was thrilled to greet the chilly morning - 40 degrees after a weekend in the upper 70s feels like a bit of a betrayal!
Still, there’s something sacred in the stillness. Something about the hush that follows the rush that reminds me what a gift it is just to be here, to breathe, to wake, to live this life. It’s so easy to forget, isn’t it? Between school lessons, to-do lists, and planning the next thing, we lose sight of the miracle of right now.
So today, I’m praising God for the gift of life.
I hope you’ll join me.
AMDG,
Mandy
3 Quick Takes
Apparently this past week someone named Chappell Roan (who I know nothing about) said her friends with young kids seem like they’re “in hell” and that she doesn’t “know anyone who has kids who are happy at this age.” I ignored all the noise until more people that I respect started responding. So I finally listened to what she had to say.
My take: I’m not sure why this is such a hot topic, but here I am, talking about it now too.
The truth: is parenting is hard. I remember being a first (or 2nd, or 3rd) time mom, sleep-deprived, overwhelmed, wondering if we made a huge mistake.
Also the Truth: It’s completely and totally worth all the hard, gritty, exhausting, and heartache filled moments. Why? Because all that suffering and sacrifice (see last week’s quick takes on suffering) can’t hold a candle to the beauty, the love, and the richness that being a parent entails. It just can’t.
When speaking at a conference in February, afterwards someone mentioned that I should talk more on how my husband and I have managed to stay married despite having a child with special needs. I did a little digging and the divorce rate for families raising a special needs child can be upwards of 87%1 I want to be clear there is a range to that statistic, and the kind of disability plays a large role as to what kinds of stressors and how severely those stressors will impact the family. And to be clear there are stressors regardless. However, there are 3 key things I would suggest that can help any marriage. Let me know in the comments if you want me to give a more nuanced take on this topic. 1) Always be respectful. I know this can be hard when tempers flare but do it. 2) Never go to bed angry. If you need to hash it out. Do so. At 1 am even. Talk, respectfully. Disagree, respectfully. Find common ground and work from there. 3) Always Apologize, even (especially) if you think you aren’t wrong. Often times your spouse’s reaction to you isn’t happening in a vacuum but from circumstances that have built up over time. No one is perfect, humility is key, and real, heartfelt apologies can help discussions move forward.
Digital Digest: How are we doing in this area friends? Personally this past week I feel like there was a breakthrough. With less notifications, and not picking up my phone as often, by leaving it in other rooms on purpose, I found myself with something I didn’t think still existed - free time. I had finished all my tasks for that day, the kids were done with school, chores had been completed and they were outside. I had a whole hour and I didn’t even know what to do with it. Should I bake something? Sit in silence? Get ahead on something else? I did a hybrid. The first 30 minutes or so I sat in silence, with nothing to do but hydrate (the 35+ crowd knows what I’m talking about). The next 30 I chose to read. During the day. It was a wild novelty for me. Only for 30 or so minutes, as the kids came back inside and dinner needed to be assembled. Can’t to see what next week holds!
Devotional Corner
Deep, abiding acceptance
Something for which our very bones ache - a Love so enduring, it sees us wholly and as holy, laced with Mercy and Grace for all our transgressions while coaxing us into fullness and complete healing.
Into Life.
An acceptance that allows our full humanity to exist - our pride, our selfishness, our laziness, our anger - and still calls us to Himself by name.
An acceptance that sees, indeed has felt, the battering of many wounds life has dealt, some still bleeding or only scabbed over, all with stories of pain, betrayal and struggle - yet calls us to hope and glory in Him.
A Love that still calls us Good, Beloved - even when seeing us as we really are - that covets us and seeks us out, that beckons us out of our rot, out our sin and into the light, into peace, into rest - into Life.
Deep, abiding Acceptance.
This month, as we reflect on the Holy Eucharist, I pray you know of His heart for you, where you are at this very moment - not only with perfect prayers, holy thoughts, and good deeds - but all the dark, can’t speak about it, ugly sides too. That He accepts us as we are - as we really are - and is calling us into fullness, into holiness, into healing, into Life itself with Him.
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name: you are mine” Isaiah 43:1
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Discussion Questions
This section is a starting off point to help you go deeper with topics discussed above.
1. What does it mean to you to be “seen wholly and as holy” by God? How does that truth challenge or comfort you in your current season of life?
2. Is there a part of yourself you’ve struggled to believe God could fully accept? How might embracing His deep, abiding acceptance bring healing in that area?
3. How has your understanding of the Eucharist shaped the way you view God’s love and mercy? Can you recall a moment when receiving the Eucharist brought you peace or clarity?
Let’s continue this discussion in the free subscriber chat.
Quote of the Week
“Do you realize that Jesus is there in the tabernacle expressly for you - for you alone? He burns with the desire to come into your heart.”
St. Thérèse of Lisieux
If you could have an unlimited supply of one thing, what would it be?
Admittedly I was all for the coffee on this poll, but I’m surprised laundry detergent didn’t even make it on the board. Anyway, it was fun to see where everyone landed. “Time to yourself” was a close second for me, but honestly as my youngest is turning 8 this year, the reality of lots of time to myself is becoming painfully clear. It is the very definition of bitter-sweet. Coffee however is an ever present want and need for this tired 38 year old!
Be sure to check out this week’s poll!
P.S. In just a couple days, I’ll be sending out my monthly edition. I’ll be sharing some gentle thoughts on what it means to De-influence your life - to let go of the noise and come back to what really matters. I’m also reflecting on Five years of homeschooling - focusing on one issue in particular that I see many moms who choose the homeschooling path struggle with. I hope it meets you right where you are.